By Brian Strafach. Click here to read the original op-ed in Mass Live.
A few weeks ago, a high school senior in a tiny, one-stoplight town stayed behind after a workshop.
“I had no idea the rest of the students felt the same way I did,” she said.
She had grown up with the same classmates for years. They had shared hallways, classrooms, games and assemblies. And yet it wasn’t until we created space to talk openly that she realized she wasn’t alone in what she was feeling about identity, hate, and the pressure of the world around her.
In my role as an educator with the Mobile Museum of Tolerance, a traveling classroom that brings facilitated, discussion-based workshops directly into schools, I see moments like this every day.
That moment broke my heart, and it clarified something I see every day: hate takes hold where students lack the tools to understand and challenge what they’re seeing.
But when students are given structured, guided opportunities to think critically and engage across difference, hate has a much harder time taking hold.
I work directly with students across Massachusetts and beyond the Northeast inside the Mobile Museum of Tolerance. I’m in the room for the questions. I see who leans back in their chair at first. I see who challenges me. I see who finds their voice.
They tell me they are constantly exposed to conflict, commentary, rumors and humiliation online. They are unsure what is true, unsure when to step in, and often afraid of saying the wrong thing themselves. But that does not mean they do not care. It means they need adults to help them slow down, think clearly and practice what it looks like to respond to harm instead of scrolling past it.
In schools where students are actively engaged and supported by educators who create space for discussion, something shifts.
Students speak up, they take ownership, and they look out for each other.
In schools where those bonds are weaker, I hear something else: “It didn’t affect me.” “It was just a joke.” “That’s how we talk.”
Sometimes that language is not just coming from peers. Sometimes students have learned that minimizing harm is normal, or that exclusion is part of fitting in. That’s why schools cannot assume students will navigate these issues on their own.
Right now, the biggest struggle I hear from educators is accountability. Schools report incidents of hateful language or behavior, but students won’t own up.
When schools avoid these conversations, harm gets swept under the rug. Communities fracture. Students either disengage or retreat into separate spaces.
And when students don’t feel belonging offline, they look for it online.
Online communities are easy to enter. They are also easy to fall into. Some students are overwhelmed by what they see and disengage entirely, while others latch onto spaces that validate fear or anger. Disengagement can be just as dangerous as misinformation.
That’s why education is preventive work. That work cannot begin only after an incident. Schools have a duty to create regular, adult-guided space for students to talk about identity, bias, online behavior and the impact of language before harm occurs.
In my work, I’ve seen what happens when that space exists. Students ask better questions. They challenge each other. They begin to understand that what they say and do has an impact beyond the moment.
The Mobile Museum of Tolerance is designed to meet this moment. We bring education directly to students. Through interactive workshops, we help students examine bias, question misinformation, and understand the real-world impact of language and behavior.
At a recent event, someone said, “The antidote to fear is faith.”
For me, that faith isn’t abstract. It’s faith in each other.
When students are given the tools and space to engage with one another, they are more likely to take responsibility for what happens around them. They challenge harmful language. They notice who is being isolated. They understand that what happens between students is not separate from school culture.
If we want young people to take care of one another, we must give them the tools, guidance, and space to do so: honesty, responsibility, and the courage to speak up.
That is the strongest antidote to hate I have seen.
Brian Strafach is the lead associate educator in the Northeast with the Museum of Tolerance, where he trains facilitators and leads workshops aboard the Mobile Museum of Tolerance for students across the Northeast. His is a former New York City classroom teacher.